The 13 year old.

Would you believe me if I told you this child was a borderline genius?  He's 13 and I totally want to send him to the zoo.  I don't really know what happens to 13 year old boys, they wake up one morning and say, "hey!  I think it will be my #1 priority for the next 3 years to drive my mother insane and get everyone else bawling by 5 am with my endless teasing and tormenting".   His favorite pastime lately is to call Grace, Grazelswift, don't ask me why, but if you want to see a prepubescent (spelling?) black girl go absolutely bananas, just call her Grazelswift.  I keep telling her that the only reason he does it is to see the incredible show she performs, but she doesn't get it.  She wants to punch him in the nose, I told her to go for it.  He deserves it, but she'd probably hit like a girl, giving him another reason to tease, and then we'll really have the Stadium of Fire in the front room.  Meanwhile, Jack will pop popcorn and sell tickets at the door.

When I look at this goofy child, I blame his father.  My sweet mother-in-law, Grandma Evelyn aka Shop Grandma, reports Travis was exactly the same.  Good news is he'll grow out of it and make some lucky girl happy, that is certain.   His dad is the love of my life, you know.  Until then, we cope and giggle a little under our breath, he really is kinda funny :o)  I love the 13 year old,  I really truly do.  I can love him at the zoo, right?

He's... just...so...well...13.

Garrett's other big goal for 2010?  Follow this dialogue:

Can you see it?

Garrett, what exactly am I looking for?

Geez mom, are you kidding me?!

Son, I don't see anything, I'm sorry.

M-O-M!  It's right there!  A hair! And it's NOT peach fuzz!

Oh, yep there it is.  Wow, why don't you share this kinda stuff with dad instead, he can see better.

Grace: Ewww...gross Garrett, your armpit stinks!  Boys are sooo gross.

THAT... is the smell of a man Grazelswift.  Want tickets to the gun show?  Oooh yeah baby!

DON'T CALL ME GGGGRRRAAAZZZEEELLLSSSWWWIIIFFFTTT!!!

Poor Gracie, she and I need to stick together.  Together we'll make it right?

P.S.  My child doesn't really look like the bad boy on The Incredibles.  He's actually really handsome, just like his daddy, the love of my life ;o)